Last night, my husband and I had a real heart-to-heart on debt and how being on the debt-free journey has drastically altered our beliefs on how money should work in our home. And how we’ve seen first hand that yes, you can live and thrive without loans, credit cards, and debt of any kind.
We’ve been on the debt-free journey for four years and it has been one heck of a ride.
There have been setbacks and failures and temptations. There have been weak moments but there have been many more strong and shining moments where we succeeded.
Currently, we’re watching a few friends of ours really struggle – not financially in the sense that they are broke, but in the sense that debt is enticing them to make decisions that they wouldn’t make otherwise.
But that’s what debt does, doesn’t it?
Debt makes you believe you have more money than you really do. It allows you to make that big purchase now, with the hope that you’ll be able to afford to pay for it later. It allows you to fall into the trap of comparison and even makes you feel like it’s “where you’re supposed to be” or “where you’re supposed to be going”. When in reality, you just end up miserable and not knowing why.
[clickToTweet tweet=”‘Debt makes you believe you have more money than you really do.’ @jessifearon” quote=”‘Debt makes you believe you have more money than you really do.’ @jessifearon”]
I’m passionate about teaching others the dangers of debt, but that’s easier to do by showing – not telling. You see for years now, I’ve been the one that’s been crazy about being debt-free. My husband has always been on board but he wasn’t exactly passionate about it. He’s the natural spender in our marriage so for him, it was more like a jail sentence because he couldn’t just go buy whatever he wanted.
But now, he’s the one that’s found himself in my shoes. The one passionate about helping our friends see the dangers of debt and of falling into the comparison trap.
He’s struggling with how to help our friends because “they just won’t listen – they want this thing because their family members have it.” He keeps preaching – “I’d rather own everything I have than owe someone money for it. I mean, how different is renting versus paying a mortgage every month? Oh, that you’ll own your house in 30 years? Well, what if you owned your house NOW? Without having to worry if the economy collapses because the bank doesn’t own it – YOU do.”
If you cant’ tell, my husband has grown to really love that we no longer carry the heavy burden of debt. 🙂
During our conversation, he asked me what he could do to help our friends. My response, was to show them and not tell them. When we started this debt-free journey in 2013, many of our friends and family thought we were crazy. Some even flat-out argued with me about it – trying to convince me that debt was the only way to live.
They’d say things like:
- You can’t get a college education without a student loan.
- You can’t get a house without a mortgage.
- You can’t get a decent and reliable car without a car loan.
- You can’t furnish your entire house without financing it.
- You can’t pay for emergencies without a credit card.
“You can’t, you can’t, you can’t”. But we did.
And now, many of those same friends and family members are on this debt-free journey too – not because I told them to or magically convinced them with a passionate speech, but because we simply showed them. We proved those misguided theories about debt incorrect.
We proved that yes, you can get a college education without a loan and you can even pay off your student loans in less than ten years. Yes, you can get a decent and reliable car with cash. You can furnish your entire house with cash. You can use cash for emergencies – even the big ones. You can buy a house with cash.
You can live debt-free.
Is it easy? Nope. But neither is trying to afford all those minimum payments every month.
If you’re on the debt-free journey, let me encourage you that even though it won’t be easy, it will pay off. You will know the feeling of being free from the hold of debt. You will climb your way out and it is a feeling that really can’t be described. It’s beautiful.
If you’re wanting to start the debt-free journey, head here for a quick started guide or head here to join Real Life Money Plan where I walk you through everything you need to know about managing your money well.
Are you debt-free or on the debt-free journey? If so, what advice can you offer to someone wanting to start or struggling to keep going?
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Ashli @ The Million Dollar Mama says
I’m pretty passionate about how much I can’t stand debt. We’ve always been pretty good with money so never racked up any credit card debt, but we did have car loans and a mortgage. By the end of this year, we’re going to be completely debt-free which I’m pretty pumped about! I think one of the biggest reasons people go into debt (particularly credit-card debt) is because of a “keeping up with the Joneses” mentality – you see your friend with a new outfit every week, so you think “I want one too.” It’s just not worth going into debt for, though!
Jessi Fearon says
I LOVE hearing that this is the year y’all are going to be 100% debt-free!!!!! That is awesome! Sending good vibes and prayers your way darlin’!
Jennifer Connolly says
So true! I wish we had learned this years ago and saved so much stress (and money).
Tina @ ProFinanceBlog says
Absolutely ture. It is all about the perfect mind set about money.
Sandie @ Fulfilled For Less says
It’s hard to see your friends and family members struggle with the lie that debt is the only way to live. My husband and I are gazelle intense right now to pay off all our debt by the end of summer. While we haven’t been outwardly judged, I get plenty of weird looks about the $1,000 car I drive and the fact I work a part time job on top of my full time job to get out of debt as fast as possible. We are so ready for the freedom that comes with being debt free, and I hope that others close to use can join our journey one day!
Christina says
Oh my word, yes! I hate debt’s guts. LOL 🙂 Debt robbed me of too much for too long.
Lindsey says
We are on our debt free journey and I can honestly say that debt sucks. If I could go back and time, I would never take in the debts we did. Most people feel this way and it’s not until you’re so far in that you realize it’s time to get out. Don’t wait till then to start paying off your debt, do it now!
Stephanie V. says
I am on a journey to get debt free by this time next year.
When I was growing up my parents were always tight financially and I always thought that I would be better than them, however a good hard look at my finances proves I haven’t, in fact, I’ve fallen straight into their money traps, thinking that by this time next payday I’ll be better.
Well I’m not, so therefore I’m all hands on deck and getting rid of all my debt this next year (I have a car payment and 3 credit cards). First step is to get $1000 in an emergency fund because I will be needing some work on my car before long. Excited to start.
Jessi Fearon says
Stephanie that is sooooo awesome that you’re on this journey and I couldn’t agree more – a starter EF is the best first step. Congratulations on taking that step darlin’! 🙂